The Frog Emperor
by Kementari
Summary: Based off 'The Frog Prince', Hotohori is cursed into a frog! And worse yet, we can never remember how to spell Taiitsu-kun. ^.^;; OOC and oddnes, extreme characterization. Enjoy!
1. Bob Marcus III

Notes/Disclaimer/Etc: This was a round robin built by myself and Akai Ku, a good friend of mine. Neither of us own Fushigi Yuugi, nor get paid   
in any way to write these things. As stated, this is a ROUND ROBIN, so it's quite different than a structured story. Pretty silly in my opinion,   
but I find silly stories are a great way to relax.   
From Akai:   
Akai: Da-   
Kementari: KA!   
Akai: No da   
Kementari: KA KA!   
Akai: Na no da!   
Kementari: Kakaka!!!   
Akai: Oo; We don't own FY na no da. 

**The Frog Emperor**   
*******************   
A ripoff fic brought to you by Kementari and Akai Ku 

Akai: Da-   
Kementari: KA!   
Akai: No da   
Kementari: KA KA!   
Akai: Na no da!   
Kementari: Kakaka!!!   
Akai: Oo; We don't own FY na no da. 

"A long long time ago in a place that was like Ancient China, (but wasn't), there was an Emperor. The most handsome, attractive, best smelling, best haired, most intelligent Emperor there ever was. His name was Hotohori, which was a really good name because Hotohori sounds cool.Hotohori was completely aware of his many talents, and often walked around showing them off to the less fortunate in the looks department..   
One day he was passing by a pond when out of nowhere, a frog appeared! 

OK, so this frog's name was...uhm... Bob Marcus III. Yes. Bob Marcus III. Bob Marcus III said to Hotohori, "Heika-sama, I am going to turn you into a frog!"   
"NAAANI?!" Hotohori exclaimed incredulously. Frogs were NOT pretty. "Why!?"   
Bob Marcus III shrugged. "Because I can. *ribbit*   
POOF!! No longer stood the great, cute, handsome, beautiful, utterly awesome and totally kawaii Emperor known as Hotohori but.. 

A frog.   
A really ugly frog at that.   
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Hotohori wailed miserably as he stared at his froggy hands. "I'm too beautiful to RIBBIT!" his tongue jumped out and he caught a fly.   
"Now you can sit here on this rock," Bob Marcus III said, "Or you can... go in the pond. Have fun!"   
And Bob Marcus III disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving poor, non-kawaii non-cute non-totally-utterly-shounen Hotohori with his rocks and bugs. 

Just then, someone walked by. It was a monk with anti-gravity-hair-and-a-kitsune-mask-and-weird-speech-patterns. His name was Angsty Bishounen #27, aka Li Houjun, Aka Chichiri. Now, because most of the Suzaku Seishi were LAZY, not many of them actually PREPARED for being seishi .So only Chichiri could use magic no da. So un-shounen Hotohori knew he had found the right DAude. 

"RIBBIT!! Chichiri!!" Hotohori yelled, jumping up and down on his froggy legs. Chichiri stopped, looked around for a moment, then shrugged.   
"CHICHIRI!!!" Hotohori said, hopping towards the blue-haired monk. Chichiri perked up as he saw the frog. "No da!!" he jerked back and gasped. "You're a frog no da!"   
"It's me!! It's me!!" Hotohori pointed to himself. "THE EMPEROR!"   
"Nn..nno..da!" Chichiri gasped. It had to be a trick of some sort, since there's really no such thing as Emperors turning into frogs, though princes wasn't unheard of. "Hotohori-sama?" 

Chichiri stared. Blink. Stare. He took off his mask to better inspect the frog, then fairly slammed it back on as the hoard of Rabid Fangirls approached.   
"D-da, you ARE Hotohori-sama na no da!!" He exclaimed as sullen-looking fangirls retreated. "What's going on na no da?" 

Hotohori was crying. In a kawaii-ish way, if frogs can do that.   
"There was a frog, and he looked at me, and he cursed me and.." Hotohori cried.   
"No da," Chichiri lifted the ugly frog in his hand. "Don't worry Hotohori-sama no da, we'll find a way to turn you back!"   
Chichiri grabbed his kasa and stuck the frog deep inside, then set the large hat on his head and sauntered back towards the palace. 

Meanwhile, in the palace, there were two people.   
One was a bandit.   
One was a genius.   
Both were Suzaku no Seishi.   
And one was very, very drunk.   
"Oi, Chiriko!" the red-haired seishi called to his studious comrade over his wedontwannaknow cup of sake, "what's a duck!? Huaaaaa T.T"   
And _I_ look up to _him_? Chiriko thought to himself irrately as he proceded to write the kanji for "kagami".   
Are you a Japanese student?   
A kanji student?   
A Chichiri fan?   
Do you know how HARD the kanji for "kagami" is?   
All right, with that said... 

A great, looming shadow hung from the door, and it seemed to be a HUGE warrior..   
Holding a frog.   
Tasuki, being the water-hating person he was, didn't like frogs. The first thing in his mind was..   
"AH!! BURN THE !*^**!** *!**! THING!!" he pulled out his tessen..   
"NOO da!" Chichiri waved his hands frantically. "It's HOTOHORI!"   
Chiriko laughed. Tasuki looked at Chichiri as if he'd just lost his marbles.   
"It's true!! It IS me!!" the frog whined.   
"Ha! That's the !***^! funniest !**!^ I've heard all day!!" Tasuki grinned. "So Chichiri, how'd you get the !*^*^! thing t'talk?"   
Chichiri sweatdropped. "It really IS Hotohori-sama na no da!!" 

Hotofroggy looked at the bearers of Wing and Stretching pleadingly.   
Chiriko sighed and began to try to write "tigress" fritfully. This was turning into sooome day... _Chichiri-san_ going bonkers...   
"I believe ya," said Tasuki.   
Chiriko raised an eyebrow. "Tasuki-san, are you still drunk?"   
"No no no," Tasuki said dismissively. "How can ya NOT fsckin' believe 'em!? Think about it!!"   
"Daaa?" said Chichiri kawaii-ily. Hotohori thought he heard a fangirish rustle in the bushes. He turned, but saw nothing.   
"Well, please explain yourself then, Tasuki," he stated calmly, albeit a bit nervously.   
"OK..." Tasuki started out.   
"We've got #%^# symbols appearin' on our bodies."   
"'cause of some #$%%@ bird."   
*sweatdrop* "Ribbit gozaimasu...."   
"We've met a pervert who changes his #$%@ age..."   
"Uhm..." Chiriko said nervously.   
"A guy who wears a fsckin' WASHER on his head..."   
"DA!" Chichiri growled angrily. Several fangirlish sniffles...   
"An' t'top it all off, no 'fense Chiriko-kun, yer majesty, but aintcha fsckin' DEAD?!" 

*sweatdrooooooooooooop* 

"Tasuki seems to think the best when he's totally, utterly, intoxicated," Chiriko stated.   
"SO WHAT THE HELL!!? WHY THE $%^$% SHOULDN'T I BELIEVE IT!?" 

Everyone sweatdropped.   
"He's right," a crankly voice crackled from behind Tasuki.   
O.O "AIIIYIAHAH!!!! HOW MANY !*^*!^* TIMES HAVE I *!^*!^* TOLDJA NOT TO !**^*^! SNEAK UP ON ME YOU LITTLE !*^**^!!!"   
Kementari: Taiit..taii..spelling onegai?   
Akai: *shrugs* I dunno...da?   
ANYWAY...it was the mean-creepy faced lady that we don't know how to spell name..   
"No da! Can you help us?"   
Taii-funny-lady floated towards Hotohori, examining his froggy legs and arms. "He can be changed back, yes.."   
"How?" Hotofroggy whimpered.   
Taii-funny lady thought. "There is a legend.. that if a frog gets kissed by a princess, he will change back."   
This would have worked but, of course with every story that you need a princess in, they're not there. 

"What about Suzaku no Miko no Da?" Chichiri asked. "I mean, in the manga no da, they sometimes are weird and translate it as "princess" na-"   
"NO!!!!" came a Takahome-ish bellow from a few doors down. Everyone sweatdropped.   
"So, what do we do, Ta-Tai-Tai-Yi-Jun!!" Chiriko exclaimed happily, remembering the manga variation.   
"Yeah, how 'bout it, Sunakake Baba?"   
*WHAP!!!*   
"!$%^#$!!!" 

Tasuki whimpered as he ran off to examine his fang. Chichiri set Hotofroggy down on a table, then settled himself down in front of the mean cranky weird lady.   
"Well, we could always go out and look for one, no da." Chiriko brightened. "You mean.. go on an adventure and find a princess?!"   
"Hai no da!" ((Trunks is hot)) Chichiri beamed. "An adventure!"   
So, Hotofroggy, Chichiri, Chiriko, and Tasuki (who was being dragged along for the sake) all left for.. a princess.   
  



	2. Hair Club

Frog Read disclaimer in chapter #1.   
Warnings in this chapter, uhn, nothing much but **_EXTREME OVERCHARACTERIZATION!!_** Gomen for my idiocy in this chapter.   
-Kementari**__**

**The Frog Emperor**   
************************   
A ripoff fic brought to you by Kementari & Akai Ku 

Sooo...   
The next day Tasuki, Chichiri, Chiriko, and Hotofroggy mounted their respective horsies, with Hotofroggy perched atop Chichiri's kasa. Before leaving, everyone felt the need to make an insane, nonsensical comment:   
"I'm beginning to hate 'love'...writing it, anyway."   
"At least I can *****n' BREATHE on this ****** ride!!"   
"*ribbit* I just want to go now so I can be kawaii and shounen again *ribbit*"   
"Well let's go Tai... Tai... Tai... Tai-Dye na no da?"   
*WHAP!!*   
"I never thought YOU'd forget my name, Chichiri!" said Tai-Cranky-Lady-Who's-Name-We-Once-Again-Have-Forgotten.   
Akai: Hey, I can't help it na no da! 

Now as stories go, people march along for a while but it gets boring so they end up in a city. This time, however, Tasuki had decided to lead them and they ended up going the wrong way..   
And then ended up in uhn.. Konan? Kotou?   
It wasn't a good place to be anyway.   
Some people looked at them funny, since it's odd to see a froggy on top of a monk's head, but most of the people in the Konan marketplace.   
Akai: (I think you mean Kutou; Konan is Hotohori's country no da)   
Kementari: ( Ka, I figured.)   
As they continued down the street, they suddenly heard a very low, eeevil cackle.   
This belonging to the crazed psycho homo Tomo, hey!! Rhyme! Ba da dum!!   
"KAKAKKA!!" Tomo grinned evilly.   
"AW give us a !**!^*!^* break here! We have a !*^**!^ emperor turned into a *^*!^* frog and you wanna *!*^!*^   
BUG US?!"   
Tomo blinked. 

Chiriko sighed. "Didn't you ALREADY get brought back once?" Tomo blinked. Again.   
"Ka?"   
"Da!"   
*ribbit!*   
*sweatdrop*   
Well, the conversation was going many places quickly, nowhere among them...   
"Let the genius remember the most minor of minor details," Tomo muttered darkly. Chichiri sweatdropped.   
"Anou, what are dead people doing here na no da?"   
The boy seishi raised his hand timidly.   
"I...uhm...can see him...?"   
Silence.   
*POW!!!*   
"OUCH!!! TASUKI-SAN!!!!!!!!"   
Hotohori shot Tasuki a menacing glare, something I guess only an emperor in a frog's body can do if the emperor was once totally utterly kawaii and shounen and nice-smelling. "That is enough, Tasuki."   
"Bu-"   
"No."   
"If-"   
"No."   
"Wh-"   
"NO."   
"I'll-!"   
"NO!"   
*pout*   
"Daaaaaa..."   
"Kakakaaaaaa," Tomo said nervously. "Kaugh kaugh, I'm here because...." 

"I've come to hunt down those twins and RIP THEIR THROATS OUT!! KAKAKA!!" Tomo cackled evilly. "And also, they were having a sale on shampoo."   
"Shampoo?" Hotohori perked up. "Green tea type or eucalyptus leaves?"   
"Kakaka, uhn, I think it was tea leaves plus conditioner?"   
"The expensive kind?"   
"HAI!" Immediately the two shounen launched into a long talk about hair care, both realizing they belonged to the same hair club. And since hair club members always help out in a crisis, even if they hate each other with a passion, Tomo offered assistance.   
"Kakaka, I think Nakago is holding a princess in a castle in another country," Tomo said as he was paying for his shampoo.   
"But the *!^*!*!^!^ blondie's !^**!^ dead.." Tasuki interjected.   
_"HE IS?!"_

Chichiri sweatdropped. "THAT was bright na no da...." Tomo no Psycho Homo was in hysterics.   
"Nakkie-poo!! NAKKIE-POO HAS GONE!! KAWAHAWAHAWHAAAa...*sniffle*   
"This is more than slightly odd," Chiriko managed to get out before Tasuki clamped rough hands over his eyes and ears. "Not fer ya t'$%$# hear... Oy..."   
Now, as we've stated before, Hair-Club members stick together. So Hotofroggy KNEW he HAD to help Tomo.   
"Ribbit," he said calmly as he hopped up Tomo's shoulder, "When we go to get the princess ribbit, we'll find Nakago for you ribbit."   
Tomo sniffled. "You really...think so...?" Tasuki rolled his eyes.   
"Of course ya ^#$%^% little #$%!!! Now stop @#$%# cryin' 'cause yer smearin' yer $%#$%^ make-up an' it #$%#$ looks even $#$% MORE $%$%^-up like that!!!"   
Of course, Tasuki knew nothing about TOTALLY make-up less Tomo. Not that _I_ care but...   
Tomo smiled through his tears. He said joyously:   
"KAAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKAKKAKAKAKKAAKAKAAKAA!!!" 

So, heading deeper into the marketplace, along with Tomo who was carefully reapplying his makeup, the uhh.. Tasuki, Hotofroggy, Chichiri, Chiriko, and Funny Lady Tai-kun all went around the abandoned Kotou castle where they could ifnd out where the princess was.   
The castle looked like a castle, except bare. So, uhn. Tomo led them to Nakago's room which was full of posters of beach chicks and eeevil plans and lots of loud cds that had kept all the other Seiryu up all night and made them grumpy and eeevil.   
There, Tomo grabbed Nakago's diary and began to read through it. 

"Dear Diary," Tomo began as he opened the fuzzy pink book. "Today..."   
*sweatdrop*   
"Today..."   
Chiriko tapped his foot.   
Hotohori stretched froggishly.   
Tasuki donked his tessen against his shoulder agitatedly.   
Chichiri was listening to a walkman.   
Tai-Funny-Lady growled. **"WELLLL?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"**   
Tomo sighed. "Ka... Well, seiryu seishi never had to learn to read, really..." He laughed nervously as the veins slowly began to pop on the old hag's forehead. "Kakakakakaa...." He quickly handed the book of to Tasuki, who immediatly dropped it on the floor.   
"GHAAA!!! 's $%$%^#n' PINK!!!!...an' besides, what th' $%@# makes ya $%^# think that bandits KEN read!?" Tai-Qwan-Doe handed the book to Chichiri with an annoyed look on her ugly mug.   
"I don't have all day!!"   
She thrust the open book into Chichiri's hands so Hotohori could read. The Frog Emperor sighed.   
"Gomen ne Taiit...tia... Oracle-sama," he sweatdropped, "but these froggish eyes do not allow me to see clearly...."   
Tai-Tan-Ic half roared as she called out to her former disciple. "CHICHIRIIIII!!! READ IT!!!"   
Blank stare.   
The monk continued to listen, nodding his head and daing softly from time to time...   
Everyone sweatdropped. Tai-Pu-Writer was losing her cool. 

... 

Out of nowhere- 

"NAGARATE-YUKU!!! MIZU NI UTSURUUUUUUU!!!!!!!" 

OO;;; 

**************************************


	3. The Chef

Standard disclaimers apply, once again overcharacterization n' stuff like that.   
**  
The Frog Emperor  
**~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
A ripped-off Round Robin Fic brought to you by Akai Ku and Kementari  
  
  
  
  
Sick of it, Chiriko picked up the book. "Dear Diary, today I plundered and was mean. Really mean. Ha ha! And Tomo and Soi were fighting over me again. They always fight. I think they should kill each other."  
Tomo mumbled something meanly about Soi.  
"But I don't care. Tomo's always leaving for his Hair Club. Today, I trapped a princess in a castle far away. Because I was evil."  
Tasuki rolled his eyes, staring at the happy chibi daing monk, who was curled up on the floor muttering about the shadow of his heart being reflected in water or something. But we wouldn't know that, as we don't speak Japanese, so we just hear "Mizu-kagami de kokoro no kage wo mireba" and before the narrator could give the readers a Japanese grammar lesson on the parts of speech, Tai-Tack-Toe interjected.  
"This is quite fascinating," She lied.  
"It's near Sairou, but I won't say where because I'm EVIL! And I know if I die, someone will break in and look through all my stuff. And you know what? !*^*!**!*! *!*!**!*! *!*!**!*! HAHAH!! You won't know where I put that !*^!*!* princess!"  
"Wha the.. how the *!^**!^ did that *!*^*!* Nakago git off stealin' MY words!!" Tasuki fumed and reached for his tessen.  
Naturally, Tai-lady didn't want that. She mentally thwapped him.  
"OW! !*^*!^*! WOMAN!"  
"Tasuki, isn't your girlfriend and band of thieves on the way to Sairou?" Hotofroggy asked, being influenced by the boredness of Authoress #1.   
"I DON'T HAVE A *!^*!*^ GIRLFRIEND!" Tasuki fumed.  
Chiriko piped up. "Yes you do, Tasuki-san. She whaps you on the head and swears at you and finds Kouji annoying with his acute skitzophrenia but thinks at least he's brighter than you are an-"  
"WILL YOU #$#$^$%#$ **SHUT UP**?!!!"  
Tasuki, extremely annoyed and red-faced Hmphed out of the room. Hotofroggy hopped onto Chichiri's head, ignoring the fact that he couldn't see anything with the huge blue bang in his face.  
"So, ka. We go to Sairou." Tomo went 'hm'. "I'd better pack more makeup."  
Chichiri was snapped out of his reverie of angsting by the green frogginess in his scientifically impossibly bouyant bangs. He blinked upward.   
"Da?"  
Sweatdropping, Chiriko snapped the book shut. "Well then, to Sairou!" He said nervously, following the put-out bandit, but not before stomping upon one of Nakago's many N*SYNC posters.   
"Long live the Backstreet Boys..." He muttered. Tomo, Chichiri and Hotohofroggy sweatdropped.  
"Riiiight..." (A no da was tacked on the end)  
Tomo looked slightly hurt. He felt he was much better looking than those stupid Backstreet Boys.  
  
Somewhere in a land of non-mortals, Byakko watched amused. He had a lot of fun when the Suzaku chosen had visited Sairou, and being a bored god, was feeling very much like playing games with them.   
However, as the seishi all headed away from Nakago's evil place, they had no idea about what the god was planning.  
  
So, Tasuki whose name's pronounced Taski and Chichiri whose name has the second syllable stressed and Chiriko whose name can be correctly pronounced Chiliko and Tomo whose name means "friend" in Japanese and Hotohori whose name Author #2 has seen spelled "Hotohouri" by a baka and   
...whoever whose name we can't bother to get right! all hopped on their horsies.  
It didn't take long before Tomo had a few "questions", "Are we there yet?" being predominate.  
"Are we there yet, ka?"  
"No," Tasuki mumbled.  
"Does anyone have batteries, no da?" Chichiri sniffed as he tried to fix his tape player.  
Just then, a loud SNAP was heard. Tasuki turned around to see the most scary, terrifying thing..  
"WHERE THE *!^*^!*!* DID Y'PLAN T'GO WITHOUT ME?!"  
Tasuki gulped as out of nowhere came his band, and his girlfriend.  
"Uh, Rassy.."  
Tomo raised his hand in school-child fashion. "If you don't have a girlfriend ka, who's tha-"  
"SHADDUP!!!" Tasuki bellowed as the minna chibid. He sweatdropped back at the company.  
"Er... Rassy, Kouji... MINNA!" Pause. "Aheh..."  
"Hello?" Said Kouji.  
"Who is it?" Said Kouji.  
"It's me, Kouji, wondering where the heck his best buddy Genrou is," said Kouji.  
"Really?" said Kouji. "That's good, because I think Rassy's gonna dismember him soon..."  
"So, Kouji, will you let Kouji and me join up with Tasuki?" said Kouji.  
"Of course! Please, come along!" said Kouji.  
Kouji grinned. "Ari-ga-TOU!"  
There was a large, collective sweatdrop from 99.9% of the Mt. Reikakuzan Bandits as they dispersed, because Author #2 doesn't feel like accounting for all of them.  
Tasuki gulped. "Er, Rassy, are y'comin' along? You'll get yer clothes all wet n' y'might loose some of yer daggers."  
Rassy growled. "Someone tell me what the *!^*!^ is goin' on,"  
Immediately, and from fear of what she'd do, everyone started talking at once.  
"Well I was cruely changed into a.. an AMPHIBIAN.."  
"A frog more precisely,"  
"And Nakki-poo's DEAD! KA"  
"And no da, my batteries ran out!"  
"AND WE"RE ALL GOING TO FIND A PRINCESS!"  
"Eh? What the !**!^ d'ya need a princess fer?"  
"So that this story will continue," Hotofroggy prompted. "And because I miss my gorgeous looks being awed at by my harem."  
"But you never _Visited_ yer harem."  
"Rassy, dear, put the daggers away.."  
  
Rassy complied a bit reluctantly. "Right, right... So we'll find th' #$%$#%in princess to advance the Byakko-@#4in PLOT an' let Hotowhatever impress is practik'ly non-existant harem an' Hibana-chan'll prolly git drunk somewheres along th' way an' we hafta put up with a skitzophrenic who only gets away from it 'cuz he's bish an' has a cool scar and WHY AM I PUTTING UP WITH THIS AGAIN?!!"  
Pause.  
"Because you're an original character ka?"   
"There's lotsa original characters," Rassy spat.  
"Because you want to restore me to my former gorgeousness ribbit?"  
"The hell??"  
"Because you're sane and you wish to end this as much as I do?"  
"Where the @#$# did that come from, ugly-@$$??"  
"Because I'm kawaii?"  
"..."  
"Because the monk has a cool scar jes like yew an' me?"  
"Kouji....;"  
Everyone turned to Tasuki expectantly. He paused.  
"Uhm..." He squeaked. "Because you love me...?"  
Everyone instantly went 'AWWW!!'  
Tasuki turned crimson and said a very bad word that I can't even hint at here, unless we want our rating to go to R-13 or something.  
Rasconza twisted her lips in indecision. "Hm... All right, whatever!"   
As she joined the group with Kouji, she took the chance to smack the Bandit Lord upside the head.  
"Butcher gittin yer own sake fer awhile..."  
"@#%#@!!!"  
  
For a while, the trip was uneventful. Cause, everyone was tired and Author#1 had no instant surprises anymore. Tomo and Hotohori were discussing hair tips, Chichiri was cheerfully humming cause he'd found his extra batteries, Chiriko was talking to Tai-lady about lots of really intelligence stuff and Kouji, Ras, and Tasuki were in the back drinking a stolen bottle of sake and singing happy bar songs.  
They reached a town, where they decided to sleep for the night. And there was a cook there since Author #1 has now thought up a stupid plot device.  
And do you know what the special of the inn they stayed in was? Yup. Frog soup!  
  
'Uh oh' said Author #2.  
'Aye' said Author #1. 'that was stupid'.  
So a very conversation-engrossed Chiriko and Tai-Ger-Food, a very depressed Chichiri, a very put-out Hotofroggy, a very Nakago-deprived Tomo and a very...well, DRUNK Psychotic Bandit Trio dismounted (or toppled of off ^.^; ) their horsies.  
So everyone went into the inn and the first thing they saw was... A guy!  
And it was a weird guy.  
He had a funny moustache.  
And wore a big white hat.  
"'e looks French," Kouji slurred. Rassy beat him upside the head, as she was so drunk she couldn't tell the difference between one baka and another.  
"Whaddthe hell's a french?" she muttered.   
Everyone in the group whapped Tasuki at the same instant before he could show her.  
"Ah, waill zhen, what would zhe like fawr dinnahr?" the strange cook asked. He looked at Hotofroggy and licked his lips.  
Hotofroggy gulped and hid beneath Chichiri's bangs.  
"I'd like Nakkie-poo,:" Tomo sniffed dreamily. "But some steak would be fine, KA!"  
"yeash, we wantsh.. s'm SAKE!" Tasuki pounded his fist on the table  
"Ah, sake.." The cook eyed the frog again. "Say, what is zhat frog doing "on zhe blue haid?"  
"Oh,t hash? Thash a prinsh.. Y'can takesh him," Tasuki's head fell to the table and he snored peacefully.  
Before anyone could say anything, the cook snatched Hotofroggy and ran away!  
Rassy instantly became unintoxicated for the sole purpose of harrassing Tasuki.  
"NOW look whatcha did, ya baka!!!" She roared. Tasuki blinked blearily and hiccuped. "I don't look... I SEEEEEEEEEEE~ WITH THE HEART!"  
"Smash," said his head as it hit the table. Minna sweatdropped.  
"Stupid soul music ka," Tomo muttered.  
  
"So what are we going to do?" Chiriko asked, Chichiri piping up a curious "no da." Tai-Bo-Staff shrugged.  
"That is for you to decide. I am only the oracle, therfor I know what will ultimately happen at the end of this fic, and all of your fates and destinies and that most of you would die particularly nasty, gorey deaths."  
"..."  
"..."  
"..."  
"..."  
"..."  
"...hic."  
*THWAP!*  
"Ka, hey, shouldn't we get him back?" Tomo asked blankly.   
Everyone agreed, stood up, and ran screaming lots of mean things towards the kitchen.  
Inside, the French guy was holding Hotofroggy over a large pile of soup. The poor emperor was sniffling, mumbling about beauty like his should never be in hot water unless in a warm, bubbly bath with lots of Mr. Bubbles and Herbal Essences and sponges.  
Byakko was watching, of course. And he decided to be mean. The scalding pot dumped over and DOUSED the mean cook!  
And everyone went YAY!  
...  
...I SAID...  
..  
...EVERYONE WENT YAY, DAMMIT!!  
"Yay!" went everyone.   
'Better,' said Author#2.  
*snickers*  
  



End file.
